Here’s the sometimes painful truth: not everyone finds dating easy. It’s quite daunting to put yourself out there and be vulnerable to someone you don’t know very well yet in the hopes of giving a great impression. For people with anxiety disorders, dating can be all the more complicated and difficult, to the extent that they may want to avoid it altogether.
The good news is that there are ways to become more confident during a date. Our matchmakers at Luma Luxury Matchmaking share 6 techniques that could help you overcome your anxiety and actually enjoy your date.
Reflect on the way you see yourself.
People with anxiety may have some preconceived negative notions about themselves that revolve around not being good enough. On the subject of dating, their low self-esteem might make them think that they will be rejected or disliked. If you are one such person, a good way to challenge your negative assumptions is to identify and challenge them.
For example, you can ask yourself, “Do I know for sure that I will be rejected?” Another question could be, “Am I a bad person if the date doesn’t work out?” Of course, the answer to both questions is no.
Make mistakes — and forgive yourself.
When you’re on a date, one of the best things you can do is to quiet your inner critic. Perceived personal imperfections may make you anxious, but they are also some things that could endear you to your date. Making an innocent mistake may actually make your date like you more, so don’t be afraid to be less-than-perfect and forgive yourself.
Admit and accept your anxiety.
Communication can unlock doors, and expressing your feelings is a great way to remove the negativity. We understand that communicating your anxiety is not easy, but it could be necessary. If you are going out on a date, you must decide early on how much about your anxiety you will disclose. Sharing about it to your date could actually be an opportunity to form a bond.
If you decide not to share it with your date, it could be helpful to verbalize it to a friend so you can process it better and know that it’s not just inside your head.
Look at the positive things.
Remember to slow down while you are on your date and look for the positives so you can emphasize them in your mind. Pay attention to the parts that are going well on the date. For example, you can note the way your date smiled when they sat down or when you answered a certain question.
Practice relaxation techniques.
Doing relaxation techniques prior to your date can help lower your anxiety level. These techniques include:
- Deep breathing
- Mindful meditation
- Guided imagery
Take time to prepare yourself.
Preparation can go a long way when it comes to many things, and dating is no different. Before your date, ready a few questions or talking points to help you feel a bit more in control. When there’s a pause in the conversation, you can ask one of your prepared questions, such as:
- What are you currently watching on Netflix?
- If you could go to any place tomorrow, where would it be?
Get Help from an Expert Matchmaker
Ready to start dating? Luma Luxury Matchmaking offers you a unique and personalized matchmaking service. Our goal is to take as much of the strain and uncertainty in dating by understanding who you are and what you’re looking for in a partner so we can match you.
Contact us today to inquire.