How To Find A Relationship (Plus Matchmaking Success Stories!)

Modern dating can feel like a full-time job, and a frustrating one at that. If you’ve been searching to no avail and are wondering how to find a relationship with long-term potential, you’re not alone. According to the Pew Research Center, nearly half of all US adults say that dating has gotten harder over the last decade.

That’s one reason so many singles are turning to matchmaking services. The matchmaking success stories you find online aren’t just feel-good anecdotes, either. They can offer real insight into what works in the modern dating scene to find meaningful connections. We’ll share our best tips for finding lasting love in 2025 and dive deeper into our LUMA love stories to help you understand what works.

Why So Many Singles Struggle To Find Love Today

Modern dating certainly leaves us with no shortage of options, but that might be doing more harm than good. Tons of singles feel more discouraged than ever when it comes to finding lasting relationships. Dating apps may have made it easier to meet new people, but they’ve also introduced new challenges that make genuine connections harder to build.

One of the biggest issues is dating burnout. Between ghosting, endless texting, and dates that lead nowhere, many singles are finding themselves emotionally spent. Our culture of instant gratification isn’t without blame, either. Dating app profiles are judged in seconds, conversations are superficial, and romantic sparks fizzle out just as quickly as they started.

Our lightning-speed, shallow dating scene feels transactional and deeply impersonal to singles who want a real, lasting relationship. Plus, more singles than ever are open to hookups, which can make commit-minded singles feel isolated from their peers. Anyway you look at it, singles are facing greater challenges each year when it comes to finding love.

All of these issues have left singles reconsidering how they approach dating altogether. Instead of just relying on soulless algorithms or random chance, some are choosing more curated, intentional paths. Matchmaking and other dating services are gaining popularity with successful professionals who don’t have the time to spend swiping on apps.

Really, it’s not that love is impossible to find. It’s that the sites, apps, and algorithms aren’t working for everyone, especially for those seeking lasting relationships. For anyone feeling stuck right now in their dating life or wondering how to find a relationship, just know that there are other options than dating apps. Success might come from rethinking the way you date entirely.

How to Find A Relationship In 2025

If traditional dating methods haven’t worked, there’s a silver lining: you’re not out of options! In 2025, finding a real relationship requires more than just downloading another app. It takes a strategic approach with self-awareness, openness, and intentionality. Here are 6 mindset shifts you need to make to learn how to find a relationship that lasts:

1. Focus On Quality, Not Quantity

It’s easy to conflate time spent with real progress, especially on dating apps. But spending hours swiping doesn’t necessarily bring you closer to finding the right partner. Instead, focus on fewer, more promising matches that actually align with your values and goals.

2. Get Clear On What You’re Looking For

Before you can find the right relationship, you need to get clear on what “right” means to you. What are your non-negotiables? What lifestyle factors are important to you in a partner? Defining your priorities will help you recognize real compatibility when you see it and avoid wasting time on the wrong people.

3. Invest Your Time In The Right Spaces

Plant yourself in settings where people are more open to conversation, like niche groups, professional networking events, or even local speed dating. These kinds of environments make it easier to connect with like-minded people who are serious about expanding their connections.

4. Stay Grounded In Your Values

The dating scene is constantly evolving, and it’s easy to get swept up in trends. But core relationship values like respect, communication, and honesty are always attractive. Don’t chase what’s popular; focus on what’s truly meaningful. The right relationship won’t ask you to be someone you’re not.

5. Ensure You’re Emotionally Available

Whether you’re emotionally available will set the tone for the kind of people you attract. Ask yourself: are you in a place where you’re ready to give and receive love? Are your dating habits aligned with the type of relationship you want? Being emotionally available is going to help you attract partners with real long-term relationship potential.

6. Be Open To Support

Finally, know that you don’t have to navigate the dating scene alone. A relationship coach or professional matchmaker can offer much needed clarity, guidance, and introductions to deeply compatible singles. If you’re ready to invest in your love life, a matchmaker can replace the stress and hassle of modern dating with confidence and connection.

Real Matchmaking Success Stories

Dating apps promise to connect you with hundreds of singles, but they fall short when it comes to creating real, lasting relationships. That’s where personalized matchmaking services truly shine. At LUMA, we’ve worked with thousands of successful professionals who were ready to find a relationship and were done wasting time on the wrong people. Here are just a few examples of our matchmaking success stories:

Kenton & Coleen: From Frustrated To Fulfilled

When Kent first joined LUMA, he knew he was ready for something serious. But like thousands of other singles, he was frustrated with the dating landscape. As an engineer and published author, he was thoughtful and intentional, but he hadn’t found someone who truly aligned with his values and passions.

Before we planned introductions for Kent, we took the time to understand what he truly needed in a partner and what hadn’t worked in the past. He enjoyed his first two introductions, but didn’t feel a spark. We listened to his feedback, refined our search parameters, and introduced him to his next match: Coleen.

Coleen, a successful therapist, has a warm, grounded energy that complements Kent’s. On their first date, they both felt a deep connection and chemistry. What started as a promising match is now a committed partnership rooted in respect, passion, and adventure.

Kent and Coleen are still thriving as a couple. They’re travelling the world and building a beautiful life together. For Kent, what started as a last-ditch effort filled with frustration became a fulfilling LUMA love story.

Michael & Michelle: A Match Fated To Be

Before joining LUMA, Michael hadn’t had much luck with dating. Like most singles, he struggled to make connections on dating apps, and his local dating scene felt too superficial for him. When he reached out to LUMA, he wasn’t just looking for introductions. He knew he needed real support, tailored guidance, and someone to be his cheerleader along the way. That’s exactly what he found in his matchmaker, Cecilia.

Michelle, on the other hand, hadn’t been actively dating. As a busy professional, she hadn’t prioritized her love life and initially joined LUMA’s match database without real expectations. Serendipitously, Michael and Michelle had both worked for the same large agency, but had never met until their matchmaker, Cecilia, brought them together.

What started as an intentional introduction quickly grew into something deeper. Their shared values, personalities, and openness allowed their connection to truly flourish. Though they hadn’t crossed paths before, it turned out they were infinitely more aligned than either expected.

Today, they’re happier than ever, serving as a reminder that sometimes, the right person isn’t a stranger at all. They’re someone you might never meet unless you have the right people to make the introduction.

Jason And Khrystena: Taking A Chance On Love

Jason wasn’t sure where to even begin as he re-entered the dating world. The idea of navigating it alone felt daunting, especially in his local, often casual dating scene. Khrystena was just as uncertain about her path to finding true love. Their desire for a more intentional dating experience led them to LUMA, but both had initial doubts. Would it work? Would it feel forced? 

But with the guidance of their LUMA matchmaker, their uncertainty faded away. Having someone who understood their relationships goals and could introduce them to amazing connections made all the difference. And their first introduction with long-term potential? It turned out to be with each other.

From their first date, things felt easy, comfortable, and genuine. There was no need to force a spark; it was natural. Jason and Khrystena developed their relationship over time, based on shared values and deep compatibility. They’re still building a beautiful life together, having been married and started a family.

Their story is a testament to what’s possible when you’re willing to take a chance on love, even when you’re uncertain about the process. Sometimes, they right person shows up when you stop trying to control the outcome and start trusting the process instead.

What These Stories Can Teach You About How To Find A Relationship

The couples we’ve introduced didn’t find love by accident. Their stories might feel fortuitous, but there were clear pathways that led to those connections, and they’re worth taking a closer look at if your serious about finding a real relationship. Here are few key takeaways that come up again and again:

1. Know What You Actually Want

This probably sounds simple, but it’s where most people get stuck in their dating journey. It’s easy to stick to a list of preferences, but difficult to get clear on your real values. The people who learn how to find a relationship weren’t just chasing a spark; they were looking for alignment and long-term potential.

2. Be Open To The Process

Most of these love stories didn’t start with instant certainty. In fact, several clients were hesitant or skeptical at first. But they allowed themselves to try a new approach, and their openness to trust the process led to them finding the right connection.

3. Don’t Underestimate The Value Of Guidance

Dating can be overwhelming, especially when you’re going at it alone. Having someone in your corner, like a matchmaker, coach, or even a close friend, can make all the difference. The right support system doesn’t just save time. It helps you stay grounded and focused on what truly matters.

4. When It’s Right, It Feels Easier

No relationship is effortless, but the healthiest ones usually feel comfortable, not stressful. That’s something we hear often: “It just felt right.” The connections in our LUMA love stories were forced. They unfolded naturally at their own pace because each couple was ready for the same kind of love.

Is Matchmaking Right For You?

If you’ve been navigating the dating world on your own and still can’t figure out how to find a relationship, it might be time to consider another approach. After years without real success, many singles realize that apps, meet-cutes, and casual introductions just aren’t enough, especially when you’re looking for a real, lasting relationship.

That said, matchmaking isn’t for everyone. But for those who value their time, know what they want, and are ready for a more intentional approach to dating, it can be a powerful way to meet other singles who are aligned with your lifestyle, values, and long-term goals.

The success stories we shared above aren’t fairytales. They’re 100% real, and the result of connection, communication, and the right kind of support. And for many of our clients, working with a matchmaker is the thing that finally made dating feel exciting again.

At LUMA, we’re dedicated to helping our clients find real, lasting relationships. Our process focuses on real connection and chemistry, not apps, algorithms, or casual encounters. Our matchmakers have a combined experience of 250 years, making them some of the most seasoned professionals in the industry.

Whether you’re seeking a Catholic Matchmaker, Indian Matchmaker, or Hispanic Matchmaker, our team offers specialized searches for nearly every community and preference. Schedule a call with one of our Certified Matchmakers today, and the next success story might just be yours.